The Cult I Left Behind
Newly-ish married couple, Amanda and Kyle, discuss Amanda’s upbringing in the IBLP cult of Duggar infamy – a story Kyle learns about along with listeners. Through sometimes humorous, sometimes heartbreaking stories, Amanda and Kyle explore the cult’s ideology, the strange rules that surrounded Amanda’s childhood, and the abuse she endured before leaving the cult. Through it all, they talk about what it takes to break free from a cult and what gets left behind.
The Cult I Left Behind
94 - Creating Joy When Life Has Been Heavy
The holidays come with an expectation of joy. For many people, that expectation can feel impossible.
In this quiet, honest conversation, Amanda shares a truth she’s been sitting with for a long time: healing doesn’t automatically make you receptive to happiness or joy. When your nervous system formed in trauma, joy doesn’t arrive on command, and it often can’t depend on other people or outcomes you can’t control.
Together, Amanda and Kyle talk about trauma and the weight of holding other people’s stories, as well as what it looks like to create moments of joy that aren't forced or performative. Amanda shares how she has reframed joy to focus on small, sensory, unexpected moments that arrive when we make room for them.
If the holidays feel heavy this year, this episode is an invitation to let joy look different — and to know you’re not broken if it does.
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